Wednesday, February 23, 2011
It's been a long time, friends. I get home every day and think to myself, "man, what happened today would be a great story for my blog." Then, I look at my jar of Nutella on my kitchen counter then at my bed and go for my typical routine: a few spoonfuls of Nutella into my mouth for dinner, maybe a few minutes of reading or Glee (guilty pleasure) and then my delicious bed. On a day to day basis, the last six months could not possibly have moved along any more slowly. On a lump sum basis, these past few months have flown by. Do I feel like a surgeon yet? Absolutely not. Do I feel like a doctor yet? hmmm getting there. Do I feel like I have aged decades over the last six months? Absolutely. I'm getting wrinkles. My hangovers are way too horrendous to go out much anymore (at least relatively speaking). My knees ache when I walk up and down the hospital stairs too many times. I wear compression stockings whenever I go to the OR because I'm starting to get spider veins. Hot, huh?
I've both loved and hated the last few months. The amount I have learned/am attempting to learn is unfathomable. Every day I learn something new...which translates into: every day I make a mistake, get yelled at, and now wont make that mistake again. It's exhausting and exhilarating. Some days I leave the hospital in tears. Some days I leave feeling on top of the world- nobody can bring me down- until I run into an upper level resident and get yelled at for something- then I'm back on the bottom of that mountain, face down in mud, still attached to my rappel rope, ready to give it another college try.
I'm going to start trying to share stories. The craziness of this world really shines in a giant community hospital. Just when I think I cant see anything worse or hear a more horrific life story or witness a more heroic deed, I prove myself wrong. I'm excited to re-open this blog and share with the people who care to read it. I used to joke to people, "yeah you think it's all Gray's anatomy, but it's not at all." I was wrong...it's totally Gray's Anatomy- the ridiculous medical scenarios, the inappropriate love affairs, the highest highs/lowest lows all in a 60min primetime show slot--it really happens.